The “Perfect” Guide to a “Perfectly” clean house

Isn’t she perfect? LOL

We would all like to have the perfectly clean home as well as be the perfect spouse, mom, or dad.  Unfortunately, that can’t always be the case, so here is a real mom’s guide to the perfectly clean house.

Daily Cleaning Tips

• Close all the bedroom doors, so you forget how messy they are.
• Walk into each bathroom to see if it smells funky. If you do, light a candle.
• Soak dishes in the sink, so you feel like you are making progress.
• Let the dog get the crumbs on the floor.  If you don’t have a dog, get one.
• Get a basket for the mail and only look at it every three weeks.
• Pick up stuff on the floor and shove it in a closet.

Weekly Cleaning Tips

• Scan your car for cups or fast food bags with rotting food.
• Pile recycling next to the trashcan.
• Run a Clorox cloth over a few counters.
• Consider dusting and then reconsider and go watch TV.
• “Think” about where the vacuum is, then go out and buy yourself a Roomba.

Monthly Cleaning Tips

• Think that it might be easier to burn down the house and clean it.
• Have a good cry.
• Spend an entire day cleaning and make your kids help.
• Cry again because the kids messed up the house right after you cleaned it.
• Repeat all steps forever.

Hope this made you chuckle – NOBODY is perfect! It is a full-time job to keep it all together and keep the house clean. Give yourself a break and call us! There is nothing wrong with a little help!

To have a few more laughs about how to be the perfect mom, read “Mom Life: Perfection Pending”